I decided to start this little blog project because I can only send so many text messages at a time. The people that receive those messages have a list and so on…So I’ve embarked on another mode of communication. For those of you that haven’t heard from us or anyone else that is BLOWN AWAY or in denial, it’s true Trevor has been diagnosed with cancer. This is how this will go, I’m going to post the latest news and if time permits I’ll do a little reminiscing.
Trevor has been treated for a sinus infection for 10 months…believe it! After lots of antibiotics, nasal rinses (yuck-o), and steroids, he found a lymph node that was sore and swollen at the end of July. In June he had his sinuses cleaned out and that wasn’t what I thought it would be either, but keep in mind I have a B.S. in Physical Education with a concenteration in Sports Management and Outdoor Recreation. I don’t remember actually studying sinus procedures. So the lymph node led to a CAT scan before having his tonsils and adenoids taken out at the age of 40. My man is a very strong, quiet man. Obviously that whole opposites attract thing applies to us because I’m a wuss. I’m allergic to pain and believe God gave somebody sense to make drugs, I’m going to have sense enough to take them. He is very cautious about taking drugs and managing pain.
The CAT scan came back that there could be cancer, 2 or 3 different types, I zoned out when I heard it could also be part of the mono virus. So he gets his tonsils out and again the doctor goes on about cancers…blah…blah…”and a possible virus”. So again I checked out and knew this was a virus. I mean come on a sinus infection for 10 months and just now lymph node involvement, it’s mono…
Monday, August 20 at 4:30 p.m. my husband gets the results from the doctor, nasal pharyngeal carcinoma. He gets off the phone and says “well I’ve got cancer” like “i’m going to go water the garden”, like it’s something we deal with all the time. I thought “well I’m going to go pee on a stick and see if I’m pregnant”, I’ll show you! (It’s physically impossible for us to have any more babies because of the implementation of a surgical procedure.) But the way he said it was like it was no biggie. I asked him if he was expecting this news and he said, “Angi the doctor told us all the possibilities and the likelihood of cancer.” Ummm, yea well how long has he known me and when have I ever listened to EVERYTHING?! I generally pick and choose what I want to hear. This has been diagnosed as Selective Listening, and apparently it’s genetic because I have siblings that suffer from this as well.
We met with the radiation oncologist and he said that as long as the cancer was from the clavicle up, “this is very curable”. I wrote that down in black ink. Anything found below the clavicle will be difficult and manageable. Trevor goes for his PET scan on Tuesday and our prayer is that this disease in localized from his neck up. That the lymph nodes involved along his jaw line and the cancer that was behind his adenoid tissue is it. God has been so faithful over the past 10 months that I know He is going to carry us through the next 7 weeks.
I HATE that my husband is going to have to go through this. I actually prayed this Thursday as I was leaving our school. We were scheduled to meet the radiation oncologist and I had dressed so smartly, I thought. I was trying to look like I have it all together, trying to make a good first impression. As I was leaving my children’s school, I stepped off the last step walking into the parking lot and wiped out, face planted tripping over my new CUTE wedge sandals, in my white pants. All this was witnessed by two cutsie mommies chatting it up in there cute little put together selves. Humbling…I shouldn’t try to be something I’m not. Cute wedge sandals aren’t worth it. I prayed all the way to the walk-in clinic “Please God let me have a broken foot and my husband not have cancer”, repeatedly. Well after he met me there, my foot is sprained really good and he still has cancer!
Something that I learned this week about my children and the way we’ve raised them. We’ve talked to them about making good choices. Society talks about drugs, alcohol, abstinence, those are choices. My kids think “Crap and Gosh” are bad words. And the word Cancer scares them to death, and you can’t choose cancer. Tell your children about cancer, it doesn’t always end in tragedy.
Our prayer is that his cancer is localized in his neck and adenoid tissue, that after 7 weeks of chemo and radiation Trevor be COMPLETELY healed and that our whinning doesn’t get in the way of God dumping his blessings on us and those around us.
“My Grace is sufficient for you for My power is made perfect in weakness” II Corinthians 12:9
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